lifestyle – Rolanda L., Professional Organizer

5 Tips to Transform Your Home Into a Weekend Self Care Oasis

Self care: it’s something our friends, our doctors, our therapist, and perhaps our life coaches all recommend. However, most of us have come to the conclusion that implementing self care is easier said than done. Going home to a peaceful, quiet setting may especially be difficult among the confined spaces and abundance of noise in large metro areas like New York City. Nevertheless, virtually anyone can transform an ordinary room into a relaxing, rejuvenating refuge from the outside world, even if the world outside houses the rumbling trains and noisy crowds that characterize Manhattan.

1. Set the tone with lighting.

Migraine sufferers and people who are otherwise sensitive to light can attest to the impact of feeling overstimulated in a brightly-lit room. When your objective is to wind down, the lighting in the room can have a direct impact on your ability to power down. If you don’t have a light dimmer installed, you can make simple changes such as exchanging bright, everyday light bulbs with bulbs that are of a lower wattage. For an even easier hack, simply utilize a small lamp to illuminate the room instead of using standard overhead lighting. Himalayan salt crystal lamps have become increasingly popular to achieve a spa-like, ionized atmosphere. Candle lovers may even opt to forgo electricity altogether and simply light candles to achieve the perfect level of brightness. Scented candles may further enhance the setting by adding a calming fragrance to the room.

2. Wake up your sense of smell.

Aromatherapy is often overlooked in Western cultures as a means of encouraging the mind to enter a more relaxed state. Placing essential oils in a diffuser, placing a few drops of oil on a washcloth in a scented steam shower, spritzing a room with a favorite fragrance, or drying off after a bath with warm towels infused with scented oil are just a few ways naturally calming fragrances can be implemented into daily living. Some of us are aware of smells we associate with happiness or favorable times in our lives or places we have visited. However, there are specific scents that are traditionally associated with positive emotions and optimized mental performance. For example, lavender, ylang ylang, and chamomile are natural oil fragrances that stimulate calmness and enhance relaxation in the mind.

3. Surround yourself with soothing sound.

We are affected by sound more than we may realize. Similar to smells, sound may also be used to induce relaxation and to enhance mental performance. There are some sounds we associate with positive memories and emotions while other sounds add to our tension and stress levels. While it may be tempting to blare top 40s hits all weekend, if your goal is to relax and unwind, it is best to choose slow tempo music with lyrics that do not distract or evoke strong emotions. Nature sounds will also help contribute to your home spa atmosphere. If you feel most relaxed on rainy days and nights, simply include a soundtrack of falling rain as part of your self-care routine.

4. Go off the wireless grid.

High-tech personal devices are more widely available to us now than ever. Untethering ourselves from the electronic devices that have become heavily integrated into daily life can be a challenge. More and more people are establishing personal rules to periodically spend time away from their personal devices to allow for reconnection with the environment and with personal relationships without distraction. Scheduling a tech-free time during your weekend of self-care is essential to fully putting aside all the stress of the work week as well as the feelings of FOMO many of us experience during our free time. If you have dependent children or friends and family members who frequently call, it is advisable to inform people ahead of time before going off the wireless grid. Informing those closest to you about your planned downtime will not only prompt everyone to avoid unnecessarily interrupting your self-care weekend, but doing so will also inform the people in your life that there is no need to panic if they attempt to reach you and find that you are unavailable. It is not necessary to disconnect from all technology and communication for the entire weekend. However, going off the grid for several hours will allow you to more fully focus on self care.

5. Leave guilt at the door.

Self care is as necessary as medical care. Unfortunately, many of us struggle with guilt when we allocate time, energy, and focus toward restoring ourselves. While you may not be able to immediately change your mindset toward regularly engaging in restorative practices, you can adopt a rational approach toward battling your feelings of guilt. For example, before beginning your self care weekend, resolve that you will not entertain guilty feelings regarding your self care during the weekend. Instead, simply remind yourself that you can reflect on your new approach to caring for yourself and evaluate your feelings after you have completed your relaxing weekend. While engaging in your self-care activities, try to remain present and focus on healing and relaxation.

white pillar candle — Photo by Alesia Talkachova on Pexels.com

For more information on self-care and strategies you can use to achieve a more favorable work-life balance, contact us for a time management and lifestyle coaching consultation. Our services are available to corporate executives, entertainment industry professionals, and business owners worldwide.

On Balance and Perfection

Many busy professionals, and especially entrepreneurs, express exasperation at the notion of achieving life “balance.” Some even say the concept of balance is a myth. Before approaching the questions of whether balance exists and how it can be achieved, there is an important distinction that must be drawn. When people say they are in search of balance, they oftentimes use the benchmark of perfection. Using perfection as a standard automatically sets up the individual, who by this point is usually tired and somewhat frustrated, for failure.

Balance vs. Perfection

Balance is a scientific concept. It requires adjusting the distribution of weight to remain upright. While the positioning may not appear to be ideal or comfortable to onlookers, the end goal is to remain upright and stable. Therefore, achieving balance may not necessarily feel pretty at first. It may require strengthening muscles you’ve never used before, doing exercises that are not necessarily comfortable in the beginning, and stretching yourself in ways that may seem painful, but will eventually help you move more efficiently. The perfect illustration of what balance looks like is ballet. Anyone who has taken a ballet class knows it is not the most comfortable dance art to learn and requires a great deal of conditioning. But once dancers achieve a certain level, the beauty of the art form is undeniable. Like many areas of our lives, the beauty of ballet is all based on the foundational concept of the dancer being able to readily identify his or her center of gravity and move in ways that allow him or her to remain in a balanced state. You can always tell when a ballet dancer is not balanced because he or she will bobble or even fall. In these ways, life and ballet are very similar.

The Problem with Perfection

Many of us seek perfection, but oftentimes people achieve what they perceive as perfection only to realize “perfection” ain’t so perfect. How many times have we thought someone lived a perfect life until we saw what goes on behind the scenes? Some of us have thought we would be perfect if we were to gain or lose 10 pounds only to discover the weight did not necessarily go (or leave) wherever we had intended it to. Some of us chose the perfect major in school and later discovered we hated it; others of us may have even graduated and discovered that the chosen course of study was not necessarily the most employable degree, or perhaps you graduated just as job demand in that particular field changed. All these examples illustrate that we have to set benchmarks that are firm, but flexible enough to be adjusted to accommodate changing conditions. Otherwise stated, identifying an ideal and striving for it is a fantastic idea; however, in doing so, it is important that we spend time thinking about how we can incorporate a sense of balance into that equation.

What Does Balance Look Like?

Balance looks different for everyone, but it is generally characterized by a lack of chronic stress. If you find yourself constantly stressing over the same thing (money, relationships, weight, work-life balance), there is usually something you may be doing or allowing that is no longer working for you. An effective approach to discovering what may be contributing to imbalance is to evaluate every area in your life, write your findings down, and even track your moods and behaviors over the course of a week. Many of us have taken on practices that are in direct opposition of our overall goals and objectives, but we are unable to readily identify which part of our life is out of alignment because we adapt and continue to repeat counterproductive behaviors until they become habits. I should note that achieving a state of balance will not necessarily mean that you will not have to make sacrifices. Oftentimes, living a balanced life may mean cutting back on work to support children in their after school activities or enfing the party earlier in the interest of getting home earlier and waking up at a comfortable time to prepare for the upcoming workday. Once you achieve balance, you will know. Your basic needs will be met, you will feel less “strained” in certain areas of your life, and you will generally be at peace. Experiencing your personal version of true “balance” will ultimately compel you to continue to prioritize things in your life in a manner that allows you to maintain your newfound peaceful state.

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The Life-Changing Power of Describing Your Ideal Day

This year I have begun to implement an exercise I read about in an entrepreneurship-themed group in which I participate online. The exercise basically calls for writing out how you would envision your ideal day. Since January 1st, I have been setting aside time to do this before going to bed each night. Here is how my process works:

Step 1: I write out a quick schedule of everything I need to do the following day and at what time I would like to begin and finish each task. This part is pretty straightforward.

Step 2: I skip some space below the quick outline of my schedule, and then I list the most ideal things I would like to happen. My list includes very basic things like collecting payment on time from a new client. It also includes major events like purchasing an apartment in a particular community that interests me. It includes gifts I’d like to receive, some obligations (i.e. “mail check to pay off xyz), and will also include charitable contributions I’d like to make [I literally just thought about this now and realized I probably should write those things down here…because generosity is very important to me].

Anyway, that’s basically the way in which I am implementing this strategy; some may refer to it as “daydreaming.” The strategy is also called by other names around various parts of the internet. Generally the same items (along with any new ones I add) appear on the bottom portion of the page until I can mark them off as accomplished.

This Strategy Can Change Your Life

It absolutely can. Much to my surprise, I found that many of the items on the “ideal” portion of the page were coming to pass and that additional similar events I hadn’t even imagined were beginning to happen. Why did I experience such a dramatic shift? I am a believer in mindset. Once you make up your mind to focus on a certain trajectory, and once you commit to that way of thinking by writing it down and mapping it out, your mindset will begin to shift to accommodate that desired trajectory, and you will begin to do things at the conscious and subconscious level to make whatever you desire happen. The same is true of negative thinking. Therefore,the moral of the story is: be very mindful and intentional with your thoughts. Set your sights and direct your thoughts in accordance with the life you would ultimately like to live.

The Pipeline

I have been conspicuously MIA in recent weeks, so I figured I would provide an update. Basically, business is growing, and I am finally able to shift my focus to creating the extensive knowledge base I have been envisioning! With that said, here are a few updates:

1. Definitive Guides: The Definitive Guide to Moving Supplies has received an overwhelmingly positive response and, frankly, has made life easier for me when I walk into situations in which clients are preparing to move. As a result, I have decided to create more Definitive Guides to streamline the organizing process and to better empower my clients to remain organized on their own. My aim has always been to “teach people how to fish…” but with shelving, decorative bins, and high-quality clothing hangers. 😀

2. More focused product reviews and recommendations: It occurred to me that I should probably post more real-world use cases for the products I recommend to give readers ideas on the different ways seemingly conventional organizing tools can be used around the home and office.

3. More video content!…More on that later.

Stay tuned, people! There is much, much more to come.

Digging Out of the Aftermath of Depression

[Disclaimer: I am not a licensed counselor, social worker, psychiatrist, or psychologist. The following post is intended for motivational purposes only for individuals who would like to create a more organized environment. Individuals who believe they may be experiencing depression are urged to seek out a licensed counselor or other mental healthcare professional.]

I recently worked with a client who is an accomplished businesswoman. She is also at the tail end of a six month struggle with anxiety and depression. She described herself as “finally having the motivation to do something, but felt terrible after looking around” and seeing the state of her home. In particular, she had been avoiding her office area and another space that was dedicated to her love of working on craft projects.

Feeling overwhelmed when emerging from a period of physical illness or depression is not uncommon. Oftentimes, people struggle with finding a place to begin in restoring order to their environment. As illustrated in the example above, remaining in a disorganized home or work environment can lead to procrastination and additional feelings of guilt and anxiety, thus potentially creating a negative cycle that can become very difficult to break: eating habits may suffer, work performance declines, and a daily schedule that was once filled with more fulfilling activities may be reduced to simply going to bed upon arriving home or watching television until falling asleep.

In these situations, starting small and organizing one area at a time may be most effective. Those who have recently experienced anxiety, depression, or illness my require more immediate results. Small victories up front may provide the momentum these individuals need to keep going and to dramatically transform their environment. The following suggestions may help virtually anyone who is struggling with getting started on a large organizing project, especially those who are recovering from emotional or physical stress or illness.

Organize according to your energy level. I am a firm believer in realistically creating a plan before beginning an organizing project and tailoring the steps within the plan to your mental and physical energy level at the time. It is okay (and even encouraged!) to set relatively challenging targets, but plan to take a break or reach a stopping point before you would typically expect to become completely exhausted.
Start small. If you lack the time, energy, and focus to organize your entire home or office within a day or over the course of a weekend, divide the project into manageable parts. Can you organize one room at a time? If not, try starting with a single closet, dresser, or “junk drawer.” Whether removing clutter from a bookshelf or donating old clothes from a closet, completing the first part of a large project often provides the inspiration to do more.
Don’t organize alone! Call a friend who will help you and keep you accountable, or call a professional organizer! An organizer can coach you along while offering the encouragement and, if necessary, healthy distraction from the more mundane or perhaps overwhelming parts of the process.

Contrary to what most people believe, there is no one-size-fits-all approach to getting organized. Therefore, the individual must consider his or her specific needs and goals when setting out to affect a lasting, positive change in his or her environment.

What is Professional Organizing?

Simply stated, professional organizing is a process through which a system is put in place to help individuals and businesses become more orderly. It is one of many very effective ways to improve quality of life and boost productivity.

What is the Rolanda L. Method?

Disorganization is typically a symptom of a larger disruption in an individual’s life. Sometimes the cause of the disruption may be minor and temporary like moving to a new residence or redecorating. In other cases, disorganization may have a root cause that is very chronic and persistent. Regardless the cause of a disorganized home or office, Rolanda L, Professional Organizer seeks to address each individual situation at its origin and to design and implement solutions that will ultimately set the client up for continued success. The Rolanda L. Method is a holistic approach to organizing!

What Can Be Organized (…Professionally)?

Closets, cabinets, shelves, paperwork, filing systems, you name it! Rolanda L. is also available to assist with furniture selection, room layout, and color coordination. Our clients also love our specialized relocation packing service, which makes moving to a new home or office much more efficient and generally more secure. Having a highly detail-oriented professional organizer handle packing during a move makes the entire process much faster and easier from start to finish.

But I Always Seem to Find Myself Needing to Reorganize…

Solution: Work with a professional organizer to implement a system and/or layout that works well with your lifestyle and behavioral habits…We happen to know one if you’re interested!

If you are unable to work with an organizer, simply take inventory of your daily routine (even if it is somewhat erratic), and ask yourself if you have designed your home and everything in it in a way that supports you in achieving your daily objectives. If the answer is no, walk through each aspect of an average day in your life, ask yourself what could be improved to increase efficiency and peace of mind. Then modify your environment accordingly. Keeping a journal of observations and changes may be helpful.

Also ask about our affordable workshop events, where you can learn organizing strategies in a supportive small group setting led by Rolanda!

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